No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
