if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
