THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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