I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
