Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
