He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
So much rum. So many feels.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
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