Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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