tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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