using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
