yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I think my vagina is haunted
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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