Need sex. Gaining weight.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
