butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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