So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
