she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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