I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize