Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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