She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Randomize
