I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
