what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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