hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
