My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
my liver is dry heaving
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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