why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
