that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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