have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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