yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
