who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
i drank out of a bidet.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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