Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
