Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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