My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
