I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize