I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
