how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
