I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize