Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
