Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
my phone needs a breathalizer
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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