ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
