Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
