I cannot find my penis.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Randomize
