are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
