sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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