I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
