what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
