East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You may now shotgun with the bride
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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