I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize
