I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
