i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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