I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
