So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
