awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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