Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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