He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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