My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
whose parrot is this?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
