Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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